My Morning with Tank

Howdy folks..I am in a VERY silly mood so what does that equal? Blogging!

So the title of this post will make sense as I delve into my cluster fuck of a morning. You must realize that things like this happen to me often. Hubby would prefer I am chaperoned because I have some run-ins with some seriously interesting people.

My morning started off pretty mundane. Hubby spirited away Little Guy and I was left in the house by myself. I had more time this morning because I was going into work late. More time = complicated hair style. So after some good product application (screw flowers, get me some good curly hair product) I was off to the Town Hall to pay my property taxes. Property taxes fucking suck. Plus, it being the last day of the month, it was going to be a hot mess.

And of course. IT WAS. And because I didn't want to be ridiculously late to work (awesome employee alert) I didn't stop for coffee. Big mistake. EPIC mistake. The line was long. And I mean long. Like free shots and flashes long. So I settled in for the wait, tweeted a few times and generally looked disinterested. I do the disinterested thing because it sometimes discourages creepers from chatting with me. I also need to mention at this juncture I had about 6 dozen snickerdoodle cookies with me. I was bringing them into the office and there was no way I was leaving those damn things in the car. I worked hard on those cookies.

So back to the line. About 20 minutes in, I start to check out the tattoos of the very large man in front of me. Large as in 6' 7" (at least) and a good 325 in the poundage department. He was wearing leathers, a motorcycle club patch and a bandana. He was covered in ink. Some of it being seriously gorgeous and ever so slightly scary/perverse. He had a lot of boobs on him. So I am staring at this tattoo on his neck. I was actually trying to read it, but due to our significant height difference I couldn't make it out. He turned. I was caught. Before I could explain myself, he leaned over..blocking out the sun...and asked me about the tattoo I have on the inside of my right arm. It was only slightly visible over my shirt sleeve.

"Nice ink. Can I see it?" Gigantor asks.

"Absolutely." says Short Stuff (me)

So I pull up my sleeve and show him. This happens to be my most recent tattoo and one of 6 I have. He checked it out and nodded.

"Nicely done. I like the writing. My name is Tank. I need to pay the back taxes on my bike."

Tank???!!!

"My name is Jess. And I am paying taxes on my bad ass Hyundai." (All right, I didn't say bad ass. I am using my creative license.)

"Cool" (Tank indulging me. I know how uncool my Hyundai is.)

"Tank huh? That's kind of cliche. Like Tiny. You couldn't be more creative?"

So I must interject here. I have no filter sometimes...okay A LOT of times. I once told a guy who was obviously hyped on steroids, who was being terrible to his girlfriend, that he was probably pissed that she couldn't find his cock without using a microscope. This was in the grocery store. Hence my husband's desire for me to be chaperoned. So, picking on Tank's name probably falls into don't fuck with roid rage guy territory.

"You are mouthy, but you smell good. By the way, what's in the bag Curly Sue?"

"Cookies."

"Excellent. Can I have some?"

There is a lesson to be learned here folks. If a large man asks you for cookies, you give them to him. So I did. A half a dozen of them, which he ate in line. I mentioned they taste good with coffee. He offered to buy me a cup when we were done. I politely declined.

At this point, we are next to go. I go up to the window, take care of my transaction and leave. Tank is still at the window, eating cookies. The clerk isn't going to say a fucking word...because seriously you wouldn't either. He winks at me as I leave. And I am dazzled by Tank and the fact that he referenced a movie about a curly haired orphan. (Curly Sue. Focus people!)

So that was my morning with my new friend Tank.

I swear I will get back to reviews soon. I just read two books by Lexi Blake that made my girl parts cheer...so I will let you know exactly why when I review them.

Have a good week everyone...and if there are recs for books I should read...let me know!

Review: The Siren- Tiffany Reisz

I hope everyone enjoyed their Saturday. I didn't kill any idiot tourists, so I give myself a pat on the back. And I actually got some things accomplished today. Yay me.

Onward to my review.

The Siren is my first book by Tiffany Reisz. It won't be my last. I will admit though it had been recommended to me several times..I avoided it because it was usually in comparison with 50 Shades. Which, in case you didn't read, annoyed the hell out of me. But I follow Tiffany on Twitter, so I dug a little deeper. There is no comparison between 50 Shades and The Siren. They aren't even on the same planet.

The Siren is the story of Nora Sutherlin. Erotica writer, submissive and paid dominatrix (which technically makes her a switch). Nora only subs for one man. Soren. The rest of the time she gets paid to beat the hell out of the rich and famous.

The majority of the story follows Nora working with her editor Zachary Easton to publish her new novel. Zach has left England and unresolved marital issues for the East Coast. He is working with Nora before he heads to L.A. and is not happy about it. He doesn't think much of Nora's writing or her at first. So he gives her the almost impossible task of practically re-writing her book before he leaves.

Throughout the story you are introduced to key people in Nora's life. Wes, her 19 year old intern/roommate/constant temptation. Soren, Nora's dominant (I am not giving anything away, but holy crap) and Kingsley Edge, who sets up Nora's dominatrix gigs.

I can truly say, it has been a long time since I have been so emotionally invested in a book. I want to hug and shake Nora all at the same time. And I seriously cried for Wes.

I am continuing the habit of not revealing too much of the book. There is a heavy BDSM element in this book. Not play time people...the real thing. I personally have no issue with it, but if you do...I suggest you put this one back on the bookshelf. The only (and I mean only) thing that I wasn't so sure about was Nora's interaction with someone underage. But that's my thing.

This book will stay on my bookshelf..and I am REALLY looking forward to reading The Angel when it comes out in September. And I will continue to seek out more books by Tiffany Reisz.

Enjoy the rest of your weekend. I think a Sunday would be perfect day to sit down with The Siren.  ;)

As always...feel free to comment and follow me on Twitter @jessieobrien25

Opposites Attract: Follow-Up

Wow. I am really amazed at some of the emails I have received regarding my Opposites Attract post. So, despite my slight tipsyness (too much Woodchuck at happy hour) I decided to address the one question that seemed to be prevalent throughout the emails. I have included an excerpt of one such email below (with permission):

Jessie,

I think it's lovely the acceptance you have for your friends and what could be considered by most as an alternative lifestyle. It's not at all alternative to me. I am an old hat at BDSM (and I emphasize old because by my rudimentary calculations I have quite a few years on you). 

So indulge me by answering a question. I won't even make you call me sir. ;)

Do you plan on re-writing your friend's love story now that you know the "real" story?

I am very interested in your answer.

Warm regard,

R.

R, Thank you for your question. And much to the disappointment of some of you, no I do not plan on writing Mark & Everly's story again. They have asked...several times. But I don't feel like I would do their story justice. This time I am adamant about that. Everly will not be convincing me this time.

My reasons are simple. I am uninformed. I simply know what I have been told, what I have read, or what my friends share. And that just doesn't cut it for me. Yes, I could research. Even find some people to ask questions, but then I think the story becomes something else. It becomes a tourist version of something that means a great deal to people who I care for.

But, I am willing to compromise. With Mark and Everly's permission..I will update folks on how they are doing and share some stories/anecdotes they are comfortable with me sharing. I have encouraged them to blog, but as Mark so eloquently stated "I can't write for shit" so I doubt that will happen soon.

So thanks again for all of the interest in my friends. I broke the cardinal rule of vacation and emailed them to tell them..and they were so excited they made their friends find me on Twitter to get to the post.

They are famous now :)

Have a good evening everyone...more reviews to come soon!

Opposites Attract

If you are cool...say like me...the first thing that came to mind when you read the title of this post was that delightful Paula Abdul/MC Skat Kat song.

You know it did.

I am actually writing this post to talk about my friends. Don't worry folks, they know I am talking about them. They gave me permission. Well actually, Mark gave me permission because Mark does that whole permission thing. Wink wink.

That will make more sense as I get further into this post but allow me to start at the beginning. Somewhat the beginning. I "met" Everly when I started posting sexy stories on a sexy story website 10 years ago. (Don't ask, I am not telling). She sent me messages through the site"s personal messaging system and raved about my writing. All right, she didn't rave but she said she enjoyed it immensely. I enjoyed her back and forth so much that we signed up for one of those instant messenger programs and started having something that resembled conversation. This was when she asked me a favor. A huge favor. She wanted me to write a story about her and her husband to give him as a gift for their anniversary. A love story. Romance, sex, love..mushy goodness. I balked. And not for the reasons you may think...

I was nervous. From what I could tell their love story was epic, almost monumental. We had talked about her previous abusive relationship to some degree. Everly's fiance' was verbally abusive. I am not going into detail, but at the end of her relationship with him, she had lost twenty pounds, her self-esteem and cringed when someone shouted. It took her forever for her wounds to heal. Then she met Mark and the true love story began. And there was NO WAY I could do that story justice. I turned her down. She persisted. I turned her down again. She drafted an email to me with all the stuff she wanted to include and sent it to me anyway. After weeks of staring at it....I wrote. And wrote. And without thinking about it...I sent it. She loved it. He loved it. And it forever cemented our friendship. Which is why it took them awhile to tell me the actual truth about their relationship.

Mark is a dominant and Everly is his wife and sub. And they were afraid to tell me because they thought I would judge. Now people, this is 10 years ago. Prior to that trilogy that has tourists cruising the BDSM lifestyle. So their fear was justified. But not necessary. So I asked them if they would talk to me about the true aspects of their relationship and they agreed. They were and are very open with me. Everly admitted that her prior relationship didn't work out because she had always been submissive and her fiance was not into the BDSM lifestyle. (She is probably laughing because I refuse to type the word "vanilla" because it pisses me off). So their relationship turned ugly.

Mark has always been a dominant. He says he can't remember a time he didn't feel that way. And when he found Everly he knew he had found forever. He tells me that she was hesitant, because even though she is a submissive, some of her hard limits turn potential partners away. Not Mark. He knew she belonged to him the second he met her. And as soon as Everly figured out she could trust him...he belonged to her.

Everly is only submissive in their home. Outside of their home she runs a very successful wedding planning business (that's how they met, she planned Mark's brother's wedding) and Mark only desires her to submit in the bedroom. They discussed her hard limits while getting to know each other. She is allowing me to share some of her hard limits here (since I was nosy and asked).

-No humiliation. No name calling, no slurs, no yelling. Ever. He can use pet names, but nothing derogatory.(She explained while sometimes BDSM helps people get over certain issues they have, this would NEVER fly with her.)
-No humiliation as punishment.
-No public or club scenes
-No additional people. It is the two of them only
-No extreme pain
-Others are discussed as needed

These seemed pretty straightforward to me. I asked her what she enjoyed about being Mark's submissive. And she grinned. Mark is a Kinbaku master. Kinbaku (also known as Shibari) is a Japanese style of rope bondage. Kinbaku means "tight binding" and without getting into too much information...I think you get the deal. Plus, there are other things Everly enjoys and we have had multiple enlightening conversations. She swears I am a switch because of my reactions to her stories. And I laugh at her every time she says it.

This brings me to the point of my post. At the time of our meeting, Everly and Mark could not have been more different than I was. I was in my early twenties, in a long term but not necessarily lasting forever relationship and the only thing I did with rope was secure things to the top of my truck. But once they learned that I didn't judge them...they talked freely. They shared with me, I shared with them. And I gained two very awesome and very kinky friends.

They gained someone they could tell that they once used pineapple as a safeword and all the best treatments for rope burns (if for some reason I should ever have a really bad case of it).

To sum up. I think they are great. I don't care what they do in the bedroom. And they don't think I am boring for what I don't do in the bedroom.

Ain't acceptance grand?

BTW- Please forgive me if I messed up some details. I had this written in my head last night and lo and behold...my Internet goes out. And since my sources left for vacation (their anniversary is this week, hence the reminiscing post) I was unable to call and confirm.

I hope you enjoyed the story of my friends.

As always, thanks for reading.

Reviews- Catch Up

I hope everyone had a great weekend. I just came from a one year old's birthday party. You may envy me now.

I tweeted a blog post I posted earlier this week on my Twitter account. I didn't tweet it originally, but then I read something that set me off again..so I took the link to Twitter.

So, my overdue review. Let's get it on shall we?

Dangerous Secrets- Lisa Marie Rice

Now, I previously posted a review for Dangerous Lover. Secrets is the second book in the trilogy and is Nick Ireland and Charity Prewitt's story. Charity is a librarian in small town Vermont who has unknowingly befriended a Russian mobster who fancies her to be the replacement for his murdered lover. He is also forging a terrorist plot against the United States. Nick is sent in undercover to get close to Charity and find out what she knows about her friend. He becomes Nick Ames, a big city businessman. And after briefly (and I mean briefly) hanging out with Charity at the library under the guise of opening a business in town, he asks her out and she says yes. They go out to dinner and the sexual tension is palpable. And here is where my issues with this book begin. It moved WAY too fast for me. They have one date, have sex, and he practically moves in. Then after what seems like a day...they get MARRIED! I was like huh? And I can't really divulge anymore because I don't want to ruin the ending. But it moves even faster from that point.

I liked Nick and Charity as characters. Charity is intelligent and sweet. She is well-loved and admired amongst the town people. Nick is tough, smart and has sensitive core which he exhibits when helping Charity with her elderly relatives. What I didn't enjoy was how fast their relationship moved. But, that is also a personal preference of mine.

I have yet to decide if I am going on to the third book yet. So I am keeping these on my bookshelf until I make that decision.

BONUS REVIEWS!

I read Kristen Ashley's Knight (apparently it is the start of a series...I didn't know that until I checked her website) and I was iffy on it. I liked the characters Knight Sebring and Anya Gage, but Ashley's writing of Knight's dialogue caused me to re-read several parts over and over. Not a fan of that. Plus, I wasn't a super huge fan of Knight's chosen profession and the whole "Daddy" thing during sex? Blech. So when they were discussing her other books on a website I frequent, I was told to check out her other books. Now, Knight was a lot more erotic (the sex was more graphic) than her other series/stand alone books. So I decided to take the website's advice and started with the Dream Man series.

The Dream Man series consists of four books. Mystery Man, Wild Man, Law Man and Motorcycle Man. I suggest reading them in order. The characters follow through the books. I also found out as I read characters from another Ashley series, Rock Chicks, also show up in these books. So if you really want to be up to date, read those first. I kind of wish I had, because of my OCD (Obsessive Chronological Disorder). I finished Mystery Man, Wild Man and I am almost through with Law Man (insomnia and I read ridiculously fast. Seriously.) So here is my review for Mystery Man and Wild Man.

Mystery Man- Gwen meets her mystery man in a bar. She has what she thinks will be a one night stand with him. Instead, he returns to her bed at night. Not every night, but only at night. He finds his way into her bedroom, rocks her world and then leaves. And this goes on for a year and half. She doesn't explore other relationships, just her Mystery Man. Then Gwen's life takes a turn and Mystery Man is a mystery no more. He is Cabe "Hawk" Delgado and he is taking his relationship with Gwen from strictly night time pleasure to a full-time relationship..whether she likes it or not.

I had a little of the same issue I had with the dialogue. Hawk is a bad-ass and talks like one...and Ashley writes it verbatim. Can be tough to read sometimes. But I really enjoyed Hawk and Gwen. The unorthodox start to their relationship, Gwen's family troubles, Hawk having to deal with Gwen's antics and the competition for her affection makes their relationship seem real. Introduced in this book is Mitch Lawson, Brock Lucas and Tack who show up in Wild Man and Law Man. All together, I really liked this book. So I moved onto Wild Man.

Wild Man- This is Brock's story. Brock shows up in Mystery Man as the undercover DEA agent involved with Gwen's family issues. He is undercover again, but with a far better assignment. He is assigned to get close to Tessa O'Hara and find out what she knows about her drug dealer ex-husband. And he gets close...as her boyfriend. For four months he is Jake Knox. And Tessa is in love with him. Until she gets taken into custody by the police for having lunch with her ex-husband and she finds out who Jake really is. During her interrogation, Brock find out what really happened to Tessa when she was married to her husband. Tessa isn't sure that she can get over the fact that he lied to her and she feels like he used her to build his case against her ex...and Brock doesn't want to let go of his sweet, cake baking Tessa. Tessa continues to be unconvinced until things start happening to her. And she also find out that Brock comes with a psycho ex-wife and two children.

I loved Wild Man. I loved the contrast between rough and tumble Brock and sweet, but strong Tessa. Their relationship had even more reality than Mystery Man. It wasn't neat and clean. It came with exes, kids, insecurities and nosy families. And that's as real as it gets. The same dialogue issue..I wish Ashley would use descriptors of how they are talking, instead of writing it how they would actually speak. Mitch and Hawk are also in this book. Mitch gets his own story in Law Man...which I am currently almost finished with.


I will post a review for Law Man and Motorcycle Man (Tack's story) as soon as finish. Both of these books will be staying on my bookshelf. I enjoyed the flawed alpha male characters and the sweet, yet strong female leads.

I hope everyone has a great week. As always, comment with reading recommendations or follow me on Twitter @jessieobrien25


Just a note- I try not to get into too much detail with these reviews because frankly, I don't want to ruin the book for you. I have read reviews where they break the whole thing down and then reading the story seems rather pointless. But, if you want me to elaborate on anything further before you spend the money...just ask!

Sad Friday

Hello everyone. I won't be posting reviews today. I will make up for it this weekend by posting quite a few reviews because I am suffering from insomnia and reading like a crazy person.

This was a terrible Friday. The tragedy in Colorado made me want to run home and squeeze my peanut just because I could. I feel such sorrow for those people who will not be able to hug their loved ones again. It brings tears to my eyes even thinking about it.

My thoughts are will those who lost someone today. I also wish a speedy recovery to those who were wounded both physically and emotionally. It may not mean much right now, but there are a lot of people in this nation and maybe even around the world who are wishing the same thing.

I have no other thoughts on this. I will not be adding my theories, my opinions, two cents whatever. It's unnecessary and thoughtless to do anything but offer condolences and prayers.

I hope everyone in the blog universe enjoys their weekend. Keep Colorado in your thoughts.

Vanilla Rant

Vanilla. The term, well label really, has been become more mainstream lately with the popularity of the FSOG Trilogy. For those not in the know, here is what "vanilla" means in reference to sex. (Wikipedia link below)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vanilla_sex

This rant comes from a discussion/argument I had with an acquaintance today. The subject of people who have "vanilla sex" came up. And this asshole got tone...like he was better than me. Now, I know his preferences (not all of them mind you, but it doesn't take a genius to figure out some of them just by conversation alone) and frankly I don't care. People feel comfortable talking to me about certain things because I am relatively open-minded and non-judgemental. What goes down in your bedroom (kitchen, bathroom, dungeon) is your business not mine. I don't refer to your proclivities as deviant, dirty or sick. Those are labels (and insults) and as I have friends the BDSM lifestyle, they are also hurtful and mean. Plus they perpetuate a stereotype. I fucking hate stereotypes.

So why do you label others? Why is okay for you to call what others do vanilla...which basically means conservative, boring and dull. Which I find insulting. So, you like to get whipped. You wear a collar. You like to dish out pain. Why do get to cast judgement on those who don't?

I guess my point is, at some period in our lives most of us felt insecure about something sexually. Whether it's those dominant tendencies it took you forever to figure out were "normal" to have. Or realizing that the desire to be controlled is what you really need to feel free. Or after reading, watching or talking to people who are into BDSM you realize you aren't...that's perfectly fine too.

Please note, I know not everyone feels this way. Which is why this is a rant...and not end-all, be-all of truths. (I must say though, that would be AWESOME if what I said was indeed just that.)

So in the end...I won't label you...if you don't label me.

So please, take your "vanilla" and go fuck yourself. (I figure that's about as conventional as it gets.)